The New Craigslist Hookers, same as Old Craigslist Hookers by Ryan Tate and Owen Thomas

Craigslist replaced its much-maligned "erotic services" section with a more responsible "adult" section. Under pressure from state officials after a Boston medical student reportedly killed a masseuse he met on Craigslist, the classifieds site is cancelling its racy "Erotic Services" section with a new one reviewed by employees. So were prostitutes driven away by mandatory credit card payments and staff review of their ads? No, they just got more subtle. Hooker subtle!

Instead of posting nude photos with their "massage" and "escort" ads, providers now post bikini pictures, the San Francisco Chronicle reports. And instead of explaining how many times you can have sex with them, they now "quote their prices in roses per hour." This is all wayyy too confusing for customers, says the "Erotic Service Providers Union," proving decisively the Craigslist has the dumbest johns on the planet.

Is Craigslist's new "adult" category just a name change? "We're very encouraged that Craigslist is doing the right thing in eliminating its online red light district with prostitution and pornography in plain sight," said Connecticut attorney general Dick Blumenthal. "We'll be watching and investigating critically to make sure this measure is more than just a name change." Craigslist will cancel all existing Erotic Services ads , and start up the new category. In other words, it's just a name change.

There is one critical difference: Craigslist employees will be reviewing ads for tell-tale prostitution-friendly phrases. (For example, if your escort asks for a "donation" of "roses," she's actually talking dollars, and it's not optional.) Of course, this just means that the sex workers will go to other, less-monitored areas. Craigslist Missed Connections will never be the same! Or they'll go to other websites altogether.

The only highlight in this silliness: The image of hypernerdy Craigslist founder Craig Newmark, who constantly reminds everyone that his only role at the site is as a customer-service rep, manually reviewing sex ads. We reached Newmark on the phone. As we started to ask him how his customer-service department would handle the new workload, he reminded us there were other Craigslist customer-service personnel, and then referred calls to Craigslist CEO Jim Buckmaster and PR rep Susan MacTavish Best. Come on, Craig: At the very least, this new assignment should give you something to talk about at parties besides how terrible newspapers are.

Craigslist Trilogy: Cautionary Tales- Part {2.}